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Well, moved back to Missouri. Helping my dad and his wife fix up the house. I'm staying for free (basically) and just doing work. I've been tired of the mess the house is in. My brother and his wife refuse to come into the home, especially with their baby. Her oldest son and his fiance won't even come to the house again.

Well, I was moving stuff from the storage unit they've had for three years, since their friend had an accident and was in the hospital. Well, we're, or should I say, I'm moving all the stuff back from the storage unit. My dad's wife is sorting boxes, talking on the phone, and just doing nothing because she's crazy, same thing when my brother tried to help them move. I start moving stuff in the garage to make room for the new things. I found two bags of manure my mom bought for the yard, they split up 7 years ago. The top for a Frigidaire washer, that broke over ten years ago. A coffee can so rusted it crumbled in my hands, and so much trash you wouldn't believe. If they didn't take all the trash left on the curb, I'd have to rent a dumpster.

I put stuff in a pile, and dad digs through everything, literally. Stuff on the curb, he digs through to make sure I didn't toss anything he wanted. He's so obsessed it's driving me crazy. His wife isn't that bad, but she's dragged out a poster my mom bought when my youngest brother was born, about 17 years ago. Some things I just want to go away. Even a desk with one leg, they say her brother or uncle, someone wants all their wood stuff. I'm doubting, but they don't need to hold onto it for him or even worry about this junk, because it's a waste of space when they're trying to move all the stuff in the house to the new one. They put it in the vehicle to take back. Dad grabs more junk, I kick the leg in on the desk. They see it later, talk, and put it in the car. Dad's trying to keep a box for a car charger, asks if I've seen the charger, had the manual in his hand. I said, "It's basic info, just read instructions online, but you can figure it out, just throw that away." He grabs it in the most ridiculous way, like he's being a clever child... I was trying not to drag out the desk and beat it with a bat, so I pick up an old car cleaning brush I know I've seen for 10 plus years, never been used, covered in dust, cobwebs and dead bugs, smash it into ten pieces on the ground, and throw them all in the trash, in front of dad. He doesn't talk to me for awhile.

I call my brother that's married, 2 1/2 years younger, and won't come to the house. He laughs and lets me vent. He's tried his hardest, I said dad may get a divorce because his wife is pissed at him. My brother asked me, in all hopefulness, if it's that serious. We'll see, I'm not sure. She's been married twice before. I think their crazy @$$es deserve eachother and are lucky to find anyone.

Currently, if I got the biggest moving truck I could drive without a CDL, I think I could fill it up with his papers, maps, magazines and survey equipment. Dad saves magazines, all letters, all his email, prints out his email and saves a hard copy, all to excess. I owe him money for my one credit card, I've got the other paid off, and I want to work off what I owe him, but this is getting ridiculous. I've only been here a week. So far, I've spent about 60 hours working on the house, got about one meal in a day (they don't and can't cook here without dishes) and only worked a couple days so far. Work today and tomorrow for Sears delivery.

Anyone else dealt with hoarders in their family? Have any suggestions? My parents were together for over 25 years. Dad's hoarding, lack of respect, and lack of responsibility are what caused them to divorce. Among other things.
 

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Wow dude, you sound EXACTLY like me. My mom is an extreme hoarder too, and that's part of why my parents divorced. I tried to clean my moms house, so did my brother and his wife. Same issue, my mom would dig through the garbage and pull 90% back to keep. She would keep empty beat down cardboard boxes because someone my need a box. She even kept her college notes from 1972 because one day my kids might need them for their college! I feel ya man, hang in there.
 

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Wow! :eek:

So sorry you have to deal with this. :(

I wish I could offer a suggestion or advice but I've never had to deal with this issue personally; although my Father-in-law falls into this catagory we haven't had to address it yet.
 

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My dad does it too, not quite to this extreme but still. Solution mom took dad out, and when they got back most of it was gone. He was kinda pissed but he got over it.
 

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I don't know your Dad and what motivates his behavior, so what I have to say may or may not apply. Often people do these sorts of unhelpful things because, in their way of thinking, they feel the unhelpful behavior does do something else positive for them. This is why, often, telling hoarders the benefits of change doesn't seem very helpful. Professionals deal with this much more than you might expect, consulting one (who is able to understand your Dad's motivations) would be my best recommendation. KF4sign (Warren)
 

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Set the hoard a blaze. Cant stop the fire from burning then you cant save hoarded junk. On an episode of hoarders one guy had like 36 tons of scrap metal in his back yard.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
I have a couple pounds of metal, but nothing that high.
 

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I'd say he needs some professional help, it's affecting his relationships with his family which is generally a good sign it's become excessive.

Having to move my own stuff has cured me of keeping anything that I or anyone else "might need" unless it's an expensive to replace tool.
 
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