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Discussion Starter #1
Police Comments!!!

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The following 15 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos
around the country.

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch
after you wear them a while


# 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a
worthless document."


#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."


#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed
of the bullet that'll be chasing you."


#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write
anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"


#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it
will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"


#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O. K., I'm warning you not to do that again
or I'll give you another ticket."


#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or
not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"


#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to
ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."


#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven."


#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."


#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"


#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed
to write as many tickets as we can."


#2 "I'm glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of
yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."


AND THE WINNER IS....


#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't.
Sign here."
 

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thats great! i love it....
 

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I love it
 

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Discussion Starter #6
no actually ive heard a cop say some things like this to people....my stepfather....he would say something smart all the time
 

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I think #1 (although funny as H***) might get you a chat with the sarge to. Of course off the record he'd probably think it was as funny as you did....
 

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Ive used the supervisor (#10) at my old job. I was the manager for the evening shift. Had one pissed off trucker, he came early and was freaking out cause the shipment wasnt ready to go. He started giving the guys **** and I walked over and told him it would be ready in 30 minutes as usuall and to please go back to his truck cause no one is supposed to be back here. He flips out and yealls at me "I want to speak to the manager right ****ing now!" all I said was "OK, what can I do for you?" He just turned red and walked right back to his truck. 30 minutes later the guys had it in his truck and he was on his merry old way

EDIT: some of those will work at other jobs lol, ok its been a long two days alright :eek:
 

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I'm not sure I want to know what job #15 will work for besides law enforcement. :D
 

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lol not one Ive ever done thats for sure. ;)
 
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