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Jedi Master
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Discussion Starter #1
I'm trying to use something else other than your usual, "leave your name and number and i'll get back with you..." thing.

so if you guys and gals have any ideas as to what i should put, serious, funny, confusing, whatever, lets hear what you got....
 

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Nativedetroiter said:
do this, act like you really answered your phone. That is what I have on my cell, and then I go, bam, thought you got me, instead leave a message! Laughing...
Yeah, a good take on this is to have some music blaring. Yell "Hello" then "what?" a time or two then "Someone turn that music down" and then turn down the music like you were having a party. Then do the "Oh, I'm not here right now, leave a message."

"Thank you for calling 911, our offices are closed because everyone is at the donut shop. We discussed the situation before we left and we believe you are old enough to be responsible while we are away. Please be careful with matches and do not play with knifes and things should be ok until we are back. Hang up the phone now."

"Hello, this is Bob the burglar, the owner ain't home right now. So if you wanna leave a message then do so. But it won't matter cause I'm gonna take the answering machine, then the telephone, then the TV, then the stereo, and the VCR and all the money. "

"There's no one here but Smith, Wesson, and me. I bet your dieing to hang up and not leave a message, but dieing ain't much of a livin boy. So go ahead make my day. "

And my personal favorite, record as a song...

We're sorry we're not home right now we thank you for your call.
We are such merry people we love you one and all.
Please leave your name and phone number we'll call you back with luck.
But if you should hang up to soon go take a flying... (then the machine beeps. ;) )
 

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Hello! and welcome to the (insert your city name here) Police Department Rescue Phone!

If you know the name of the felony being commited press one!

To choose from a list of felonies press two!

If you are being murdered or calling from a rotary phone please stay on the line and an officer will assist you!

(PAUSE)

Were sorry all lines are currently busy, however your call is important to us! Please leave your name and number and officer (insert your last name here) will return your call within TWENTY FOUR hours!

THANK YOU FOR CALLING THE (insert your city name here) POLICE DEPARTMENT RESCUE PHONE!

BEEP!

Taken from The Simpsons with my own little twist thrown in after the (PAUSE). Works best if you say it with a professionally oiled voice and the jovial inflection and tone of a Simpsons Springfield police officer! :rofl:

If I could post up mp3's here I'd upload the original so you know how to say it just right. :)
 

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I wanted to have the preview guy (Don LaFontaine) do mine in the style of a movie trailer. I can do a decent impression of it, but it's still nothing close.

OR

What I have done is just record a scene from a movie into the phone and let it play for a little while. The first time I did this was the newsroom scene in Bruce Almighty when Jim Carrey changes the other guys voice. It was pretty funny.

~Chuck
 

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Motorboatin' SOB, Headlight Cleaning Guru
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i used one in college that went something like:

hi, this is mike.
if you are my parents, please send money.
if you are one of my friends, you owe me money.
if you are my university's financial department, i already sent the money.
if you are my bank, you didnt loan me enough money.
and if you are a single woman, dont worry, i have plenty of money.

it's long, but i got a few laughs from callers.
 

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If I were in college I'd definately have some fun recording that one. :)
 

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Pedal Faster
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This thread reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld...

Believe it or not George isn't at home, please leave a message at the beep. I must be out or I'd pick up the phone, where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home!"
 

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Eleventeenth Gear Poster
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Josh_Keady said:
This thread reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld...

Believe it or not George isn't at home, please leave a message at the beep. I must be out or I'd pick up the phone, where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home!"

Click the link I posted above :)
 

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I don't get it. Is your name really James or something? What's the joke? ;)
 

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"I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep.
If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes."
 

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Well.....My current "greeting" is from a scene in the movie "Full Metal Jacket" where the drill instructor is yelling at a new recruit (Private pyle).. All the message is is......"Well any [email protected] time sweetheart!"Beep.



There's another scene in the same movie i like to use as a greeting.....and it goes.... "Did your parents have any children that lived?.....well i bet they regret that!!! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece!!"Beep:D

Eric
....There's also many scenes from "Scarface" i like to use...
 

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Who is John Galt?
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The only problem I'd have with using the funny ones (like the aforementioned "Any f****** time sweetheart!" one) is that my cell number is the one I'm giving out to company reps for internships.

Some reason, I don't think it'd bode well with one of those uptight HR guys to get that one. Though I would love to see the look on their faces when they got that one.
 

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Yeah.....My friends are the only ones with my cell number and they all know I like the movie "Full Metal Jacket"........There was one time though where a friend put me down as refrence on a loan and didn't tell me.....well....when they called.....they got voicemail. When i apologized they said they thought it was pretty funny.....

Eric
 

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"Sorry, I can't come to the phone right now. If you're a hot chick, leave your name and number and I'll call you back. If you're not a hot chick, but you know some, leave their name and number and I'll call them instead. I'll tell 'em fatty sent me. And if you're a dude, how the h**l did you get my number?"

(From the Red vs Blue 'Just for You' special)
 
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